I’m stumped. This is a situation that defies….reason. Imagine you’re a satirist having a great time making fun of stupid ideas from serious people and you come across the most ludicrous but true story you’ve ever heard. The problem? How do you make fun of something that goes beyond absurdity?
The only beliefs crazier than Washington state attorney general candidate Stephen Pidgeon’s fantastic flights of cynical fantasy, are usually screamed to imaginary people by disheveled, disorganized ozone rangers in desperate need of meds. Not so with Mr. Pidgeon. I think.
Here’s what happened. I was Googling away, blissfully finding golden nuggets of Tea Party beliefs to make fun of when I found the mother lode. The mother lode’s name is Stephen Pidgeon.
Stephen is an attorney extraordinaire practicing in Everett and dedicated to the Tea Party goal of convincing the legal system and the public that the founding fathers of our nation intended Jesus and the Bible as the backbone and arbiter of civil law and morality.
So far, so good and get this: Mr. Pidgeon is no bug eyed escapee from a mental hospital shouting from street corners.
From Mr. Pidgeon’s web site
Stephen Pidgeon Launches Campaign for Attorney General
“Stephen Pidgeon, juris doctorate, is a recipient of the 2008 Presidential Commission, the 2008 Reagan Congressional Commission, a two-time recipient of the Congressional Medal of Distinction (2006, 2007), and a designee’ for the 2006 Businessman of the Year award. He has been named in Who’s Who, and Who’s Who in Business, is an ally of the Alliance Defense Fund, a friend of Advocates International, the Rule of Law Institute, the Individual Rights Foundation, the Human Action League, the Institute for Justice, the Federalist Society, the International Justice Society, the Christian Legal Society, the World Evangelical Alliance, and others promoting religious freedom, economic freedom, and civil society throughout the world.”
Stephen has gained attention recently because he has announced his candidacy for attorney general of Washington state. He explains that his motivation was the endorsement of a pending same sex marriage bill by fellow Republican attorney general candidate Reagan Dunn.Wow, great right? Well yeah, sort of.
Here’s the first problem. While announcing his candidacy in Yakima, Stephen mentioned his belief that President Obama intends to declare the United States an Islamic caliphate and impose Sharia law.
So yeah, I was having a great time laughing with abandon over the absurdity of the attorney general candidate’s ideas when it became heart in the throat apparent that Mr. Pidgeon is dead serious.
And that aint all. There’s way more.
Among the attorney generals candidate other beliefs is that the President of the United States is a British citizen and that a caliphate is just the means to an end. Pidgeon says the President intends to create a new Ottoman empire. A new Ottoman empire right there on the Potomac river and right here on Yakima river too.
But wait, there’s more! Stephen wrote an open letter to Glenn Beck publicly chastising Beck for remarks Mr. Pidgeon feels are irresponsible. Oh good, a sliver of rational thinking right? Read the first few lines here and then a link to the entire shmeer.
“Dear Mr. Beck:
You are ill-informed on the “birther” issue. Barack Obama, by his own admission, was a British subject at birth. He has never denied having a Kenyan father, who himself was a British subject as a Kenyan native. This is easily established under the British Nationality Act of 1948. He is therefore disqualified to run for the office of the President, because the office is not available to subjects of other governments. The issue is very simple, and very obvious. Obama himself admitted that he wasn’t a natural born citizen when he debated Alan Keyes in 2004.
Let’s see you deal with this one. There is nothing “nutty” about it, and it doesn’t depend on whether his maternal grandmother tried to cover up a foreign birth in Hawaii by placing newspaper notices. It is as plain as your face. BHO is a foreign national first, and an American secondarily, if at all. That is why he thinks there are 57 states; why he doesn’t understand the constitution; why he wants to give us Britain’s health care system (it’s all in the teeth, don’t you know); why he thinks Interpol should have greater authority in the US than US law enforcement; etc. He is a British subject and has no business holding the office of POTUS.”
See what I mean? My father used to say “If it isn’t one thing, it’s twins”. For the first time I know what he means.
The other “thing” or “twin” is “TruNews” broadcast by Rick Wiles via YouTube. TruNews is to true news what Stephen Pidgeon is to sober pronouncements. Rick introduces his program with a voice of doom seemingly lifted from a second rate house of horrors. Rick Wiles not only doesn’t laugh at Mr. Pidgeon as he emphatically explains his case, he enthusiastically agrees. Together they explain all of the above and more. Lots more.
Poe’s law is about a situation just like this. You can’t satarize something that is already satire. How could one take a statement that a president of the United States intends to declare a caliphate, a new Ottoman empire and impose Sharia law and make it sillier?
There’s something else. Poe’s law wasn’t created for Stephen Pidgeon. That means there are other’s fulminating in asinine absurdity. I’m on it. Subscribe and leave a comment or share your favorite ozone ranger story.
The caliphate remark happens 32 minutes into the recording.
The open letter to Glen Beck can be found here: