I’m really worried about my financial situation. I’m so scared about what’s coming up for me. I haven’t worked in almost two years. I’ve almost gone through my savings and have almost nothing left. I’m hoping you have some insights to share with me?
I’m really sorry to hear about your financial difficulties. I can give you some guidance about why you haven’t been able to find work for so long and how you can begin to get financial resources coming your way through your work.
When you got laid off, this triggered an unconscious trauma for you. You see, our decisions are mostly made on an unconscious basis. Your unconscious interpreted the lay off as a rejection. You were a child when your parents got divorced, and you interpreted this as a rejection of you. Consequently, you pretty much shut down. You were in shock for about six to eight months, and you were only partially aware of what was going on around you. It was a severe trauma. This trauma became one of the dominant decision makers in your life. You eventually stopped taking risks of any kind, and became a sort of “ghost” of yourself.
This lay off triggered a similar shock and shut you down. You’ve been guarding yourself and living your life from a position very similar to “shell shock” that soldiers develop when they mentally escape reality to stay sane. However, in the process, you have shut off many of your problem solving skills, your desire to take risks, and your self-confidence.
You are a very talented writer and your skills would be welcome in the workplace. You can find a job. If it wasn’t for this severe shell shock that is controlling your life, you’d have a job now.
How do you deal with the shell shock? First of all, you have to recognize the severity of the problem. Sure you seem to be functioning—you’re talking with friends, you watch TV, etc., but you have adapted to and become used to this low level of involvement in the world and therefore you see it as normal. You aren’t even aware that you have “powered down” so you don’t know that you need to fight it.
After realizing that this is a problem for you, you’ll need to thoroughly understand, from you current adult standpoint, how you reacted to your parents’ divorce. Sure you can realize on a conscious level that they weren’t rejecting you, but your unconscious hasn’t realized it yet, and is still protecting you by powering you down.
It won’t hurt to do some work with a psychologist. If you still have any medical coverage, you can get started now. However, there are some things you really should do on your own to start reeducating your subconscious.
First of all, there are some dietary things you should do to help your body be more adaptable and ready for change. You need to consume more B-vitamins in the form of food, or even to take a B-vitamin supplement. Whole grains are good sources—not white flour, and basically not whole-grain flour—but whole grains (wheat berries, rye berries, couscous, brown rice). It’s easy to improve your diet and increase your capacity to take charge of your subconscious.
Next, you need lots more exercise. Any kind that is pleasing and fun and vigorous. You like the treadmill and boxing—good, go with these to start!
Also, you need to surround yourself with friends who are joyful, hopeful and believe in the bounty of the world! You need to avoid those people who are depressed, “down” on life and/or themselves, complainers, blamers, and “magical thinkers” who half expect miracles and half think they can never create the life they dream of. You’re hanging out too much with these kind of people and they are influencing you and helping to keep you stuck.
Get started right away, James, and good luck!